Welcome to the Goldings Guest Book ** We APPROVE all messages before they are posted ** Add a message : back to Goldings.org : Search There are now 5745 messages in our guestbook. <<< 1 879 880 881 882 883 884 885 886 887 888 889 890 891 892 893 894 895 896 897 898 899 1149 >>> Viewing messages 4441 to 4445. peter | send4peter@crawler.com A lighter side to my first Message Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV. And the most British thing of all? Suspicion of all things foreign! Only in Britain can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance. Only in Britain do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. Only in Britain do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a DIET coke. Only in Britain do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters. Only in Britain do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage. Only in Britain do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place. Only in Britain are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink. NOT TO MENTION.. 3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.. 142 Brits were injured in 2007 by not removing all pins from new shirts. 58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers. 31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in. 19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate. British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after Xmas cracker-pulling accidents. 18 Brits had serious burns in 2007 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth. A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after trying to open bottles of beer with their teeth... 5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out-of-control Scalextric cars.. and finally... In 2007 eight Brits were admitted to hospital with fractured skulls incurred whilst throwing up into the toilet. Be proud to be British, 21 March 2008 - Garden of england willie woodbine my dear berty,o dear i see you are back smoking once more,if you give me the place were you are smoking i can send round the fire brigade to put you out? 21 March 2008 - smoke gets in your eyes peter | send4peter@crawler.com I'm Kentishman, born in London, England .............and St George....tallyho Don't say you're English Goodbye to my England, So long my old friend Your days are numbered, being brought to an end To be Scottish, Irish or Welsh that's fine But don't say you're English, that's way out of line. The French and the Germans may call themselves such May Norwegians, the Swedes and the Dutch You can say you are Russian or maybe a Dane But don't say you're English ever again. At Broadcasting House the word is taboo In Brussels its Scrapped, in Parliament too Even schools are affected, staff do as they're told They must not teach children about England of old. Writers like Shakespeare, Milton and Shaw The pupils do not learn about them anymore How about Agincourt, Hastings , Arnhem or Mons When England lost hosts of her very brave sons. We are not Europeans, how can we be? Europe is miles away over the sea We're the English from England, let's all be proud Stand up and be counted- Shout it out loud. Let's tell our Government and Brussels too We're proud of our heritage and the Red, White and Blue Fly the flag of Saint George or the Union Jack Let the world know - we want OUR ENGLAND BACK !!!! Oh! How true!! ............. ......... ......... Pass it on 21 March 2008 - kent/london Berty Happy Easter to all you old boys, and if you don't have a buspass your a spare. 20 March 2008 - waterfordpubandbackonthefagsto Chris&Len | chrislen@talktalk.net Hi Dave Mal & family hope you all have a Happy Easter & to all DR Barnardo's x Boys & Girls & there family where ever you are in the World have a great time 19 March 2008 - Colnbrook Slough <<< 1 879 880 881 882 883 884 885 886 887 888 889 890 891 892 893 894 895 896 897 898 899 1149 >>> You can search this guestbook by: Message : - Name : - All : Please type some text: - Guest book sponsored by PC Home Help (01922) 626 366 - http://www.pchomehelp.net -